So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
