a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
You're like the curious george of whores
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
