Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Randomize
