u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Randomize
