Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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