This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
This house was built for laser tag.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Randomize
