Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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