You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
