There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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