we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
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