It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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