4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Randomize