I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
