Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
