Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
