used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Randomize
