rhymes with "ouble enetration"
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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