Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Someone came in the potted fern
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize