Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
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