I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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