I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
