Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Randomize
