I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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