i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Randomize
