It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
