I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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