you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
