It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
