Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I just googled if crying burns calories
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
