I heard we made out
Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
