You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
