I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I faked an abortion last night.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
