Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize