I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
that is very illegal...i love you.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
