Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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