plz talk dirty to me
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
