he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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