Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
