It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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