Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
