Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
That was an excessively violent trivia night
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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