So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
We need a shit load of segways right now
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Randomize
