this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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