Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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