Sponge bath it is.
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Randomize
