i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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