I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I have tasted many bathrooms
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
