i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
birth control should be required to get into college
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Randomize
