He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize