Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
