I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize