we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
